I value friendship greatly, as it takes time to come to me. Therefore, when I have it, I am incredibly loyal. I have a special place in my heart for my friends, most of whom reside abroad. Fortunately, I have understood that time and distance cannot diminish our bond. The only noticeable change with each separation is that we will be older or wiser the next time we reunite.
We all have that one person in our lives with whom we share our deepest secrets, brightest moments, and dreams. Whether we live together or apart, the distance, years, and time spent apart are insignificant. That person will always remain your person.
Welcome to "Kitchen and Letter," my blog.
As the last four months of the year begin, it's a good time to reflect on what we've experienced learned, and how we've grown as individuals. The summer was exhilarating for me as I eagerly awaited a memorable visit. While I usually consider myself an introvert, my work involves interacting with a diverse range of people, so I cherish my downtime to relax solo or with a select few individuals in my life. As you may have read, one such person is my longtime friend, Miriam.
Miriam and I first met in London back in 2000. We were both working at the Conran group, one of the most important restaurant chains in the city at the time. Looking back, we realize how lucky we were to have had that experience.
While the work itself wasn't always easy, we met some incredible people who are still close friends today. We were also able to witness firsthand how London's dining scene was evolving, thanks in large part to the visionary leadership of Sir Terence Conran.
Working long days and partying even longer nights taught us many important lessons, but the most valuable of all was the meaning of true friendship.
Despite the stress of our jobs and the challenges of adjusting to a new city and language, we all bonded over our shared experiences. Whether grabbing a meal together or catching a movie, those moments formed the foundation of lifelong friendships.
On New Year's Eve 2022/23, I talked with Miriam and discussed our New Year's resolutions. She surprised me by expressing her desire to visit me this year. We quickly checked our school calendars to find a time that would work for both of us. We attempted this in 2020 but could not due to the pandemic. We were determined to make it happen this time around. After waiting all year, the day finally arrived. It had been almost fourteen years since we last saw each other, and we had both grown up and experienced adult life. Despite keeping in touch, I was nervous about whether or not we would still have the same connection. Miriam had booked a two-week trip to Mexico to visit me, and I was unsure what to expect. Would things be awkward, or would we still be close? I knew that we had both changed and had different perspectives on life due to our environments. Did we have the exact expectations for her visit? Did we want to explore the surroundings or spend time catching up? Miriam had spent time and money to visit me in my safe place, and I was grateful for her effort.
We had our first encounter in Mexico City and planned to spend two nights together. For eight months, I would play different scenarios in my mind. After all, as I have said before, it has been a very long time. How would we look at each other? I was first waiting at the wrong gate when I finally arrived at the correct gate; we saw each other as if we had just seen each other and had been waiting in a tube station in London. It did not take long for both of us to realize that we were in Mexico and that time had passed. Initially, it felt rushed and awkward, particularly when her flight got delayed at the airport. As it was my first time alone with a visitor in Mexico City, I was nervous. I had visited the city many times before, but friends or family had always accompanied me. This time, it was my responsibility to take someone around. However, after the awkward start, we settled in the hotel and enjoyed a drink and a meal. Everything felt right.
During the fourteen days we spent together, we rediscovered ourselves - from who we were to who we had become. We learned to be ourselves and understood that time could strengthen a friendship. We didn't roam around much, and we spent most days indoors. We talked, shared our worries, and watched TV series while eating and walking the dogs.
Towards the end of her stay, she introduced me to a show called "Frankie and Grace," which talks about friendship. I wasn't interested in it initially, but we started watching it. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would, and I understood what she was trying to say.
On the day she had to leave, I took her to the bus station. The thought of saying goodbye scared me more than taking her around Mexico City. I didn't want to say goodbye because the last time we parted, it took us fourteen years to meet again. I wanted to start an argument or something. The atmosphere was tense as we drove to the station, and I knew we were both nervous about saying goodbye.
Like the characters in "Frankie and Grace," we have different experiences and beliefs and are built differently. But despite our differences, we cared for each other. We learned to accept each other despite the distance and the time. In any relationship, we choose each other daily, for better or worse.
As she took her luggage out of the car, I said, "I will miss you." Our goodbye was emotional; we said everything we had held back during her stay. We acknowledge and appreciate our progress and time spent together, finding ways to bridge any distance between us.
In conclusion, everyone experiences friendship in their own unique way. After watching "Frankie and Grace," I shared my thoughts with Miriam, making me think of our company. I hope that, if we're fortunate enough, we'll still be spending time together during our senior years, much like the characters in the show. Much like love, friendship is challenging to come by or maintain. It's a conscious decision we make every day, choosing to be there for each other despite any challenges. Couples come in all shapes and forms, each with their own set of norms. Ultimately, a couple is two individuals who choose to share their lives together and support each other. For me, friendship is no different because, at the end of the day, we are all looking for an accomplice to share our lives with.
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Thank you very much for reading me.
xoxo
Iliana
